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Not Gorilla poo you understand, not seen any of those in N8 for a long time.  Nope, this is my new campaign and Isabelle and I take to the streets this afternoon to start my mission: to rid Crouch End of its dog fouling epidemic.  I hope this spreads (urrgh!) to Hornsey too.  Who knows, perhaps other thoroughly furious and civic minded people will join me and rid the streets, whilst shaming the idle owners of this disgusting problem.


My plan is thus: armed with a poop scoop and some bio-degradable dog waste bags from the really helpful chap in the Hornsey Pet & Garden Shop, a pair of rubber gloves, bleach spray and some strong chalk from Soup Dragon, me and my trusty side kick Isabelle, set off to find poo.

Today's walk is from the beginning of Weston Park nearest the centre of Crouch End and right along the left hand pavement to where we turn right up Denton Road.  Our search yields five piles on this one stretch and we scoop and dump, and leave the chalk drawing of a cup cake in each offending area.

Isabelle sees some of her little nursery friends and sing songs over to them that "We're clearing poo-oo" as if on some magical mystery tour.  They look kind of envious. 


We also combine this with a litter pick and remove:


3 coke cans

4 kebab boxes

1 packet marlboro (full)

loads of tissues and paper

1 Kellogg's Squares wrapper

3 Wotsits packets

2 Sandwich packets

1 raisin packet

6 cappuccino cups

8 cup lids  

2 K cider cans

loads of chewing gum wrappers

8 Macdonalds boxes (from where?!)


Jeepers, what fun we've had!  Photos prove it.


Tags: Cupcake's Guerilla Anti-Dog Poo Campaign: The Crouch End Cakewalk

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Replies to This Discussion

Pictures of cupcakes on Denton Road.  Hoping to create a bit of a stir, it being right next to Weston Park Primary School.  We removed poo and drew cupcakes the length of Denton Road this morning and some along Ridge Road.  The white spray is where I sprayed the piles with bleach and the offending articles are in the black bag between, soon to be disposed of in the dog waste bins, not 10 metres away.


is it not lawless to draw on the floor? sorry for my english I am still rookie. i was told when i come here that graffiti is wrong. i like what you do but i need to know if it is allowed. if so then i do same. if ok then i join you and remove shit and draw cherry.


Hi Ravel, I thought I'd replied to this but it seems to have not posted.  I'm only using chalk so there's nothing permanent on the pavement, which is not against the law.  Rather cupcakes than poo in my mind!  Please do feel free to join in and chalk some cherries, the more poo we highlight, the more we can give our cause credit.  Thank you for your involvement.  Cupcake
i agree, it's brilliant you've taken action. A couple of weeks ago I took my 4 year old to the small playground in Stationers Park. she had a run around and then complained she'd got mud on her bum so i wiped it off with my hand. it was actually dog poo AND it was all over her boots. We had to go straight home, I gave her a bath, threw all her clothes in the washing machine, scrubbed her boots outside and worried quite a bit about whether we might have accidently caught the horrible illness you mentioned. She was really upset by the incident and it happened in an area where there aren't supposed to be any dogs at all. Good luck with the campaign.

Lest anyone think that this campaign is borne out of some suppressed scatalogical tendencies, dog poo can carry very serious health risks.  My daughters are four and nine months old so the target age for this nasty disease.

What is Toxocariasis?

Toxocariasis is an infection of the roundworm toxocara canis. The eggs of the parasite can be found in soil or sand contaminated with faeces and if swallowed, result in infection that lasts between six and 24 months. Symptoms include eye disorders, vague ache, dizziness, nausea, asthma and epileptic fits. Often the eggs are ingested when passed to the mouth by the hands, but this can also occur through contact with dogs or other inanimate objects including the wheels of toys and the soles of shoes. Infected soil samples are often found in play areas and as a result, Toxocariasis most commonly affects children between 18 months and five years.

I've also worked out where these Macdonalds wrappers and drinks cartons are coming from having seen someone today hurl an empty drink out of their car.  They are obviously buying them from the Macdonalds on Green Lanes and jettisoning the rubbish when they've finished.  I can't tell how much this selfish behaviour depresses me.

I once saw a man empty car of drinks cartons and a full ashtray straight into the car park in Sainsbury's and just drive off.  I'm afraid I react to this kind of unfeasibly anti-social behaviour, much the same as if I'd witnessed a murder. 

I'd better go out now and do something fluffy (paint Easter eggs), this is all making me mutter and grumble.  

My next door neighbour collects the pizza ads pushed thorugh the door and every so often goes round the parlours taking them back. Maybe McDonalds would welcome a delivery of used cardboard.

That seems a bit mean to me. They're just trying to promote their business and it's tough out there. 

Maybe a note on the door would save a lot of time?

In light of my near arrest, I'm not sure that my assertion that chalking on the pavement is legal.  I'd always assumed that because artists paint pictures and children do hopscotch (or they did when was young) it was acceptable.  So Ravel Cherry and anyone else thinking of joining in the campaign, be aware you might be asked to stop by police.  I doubt they'd arrest you but I wouldn't want to get anyone into any trouble.  I shall carry on regardless and take my chances (pavements that is, I will leave walls alone from now on!)

I'm just going to post the near arrest here, so it's all on one thread.

Cupcake is arrested!

Well, nearly.  Stepping up my guerilla anti-dog fouling campaign I pull my boots on, pull a fleece over my pyjamas and head out to Denton Road armed with chalk.  My intention is to write "Dog owners, please clear up your dog's mess.  Children walk here" on the wall outside Stationer's Park.

As I'm hastily chalking the letters, a patrol car slows down and moves on.  I think they haven't seen me (very inconspicuous clothing - long doc marten boots, striped pyjamas, wild hair - must swat up on guerilla camouflage) so I continue in my mission.

Five minutes later the car returns and stops and two WPCs step out of the car.  I explain that it's just chalk and it's part of a campaign to end this scourge of dog fouling by a children's park and school but they're insistent it is criminal damage and I must wash it off.  They are clear that I must fetch a bucket and a brush.  I guess this is so it feels like a real punishment.

I am actually gleeful. It furthers my campaign far more than the writing would have done but I'm disappointed they won't let me take a picture of what I've done so far. I am told that I might get away with a nicely laminated sign on the wall.

So, back to Ridge Road for my pail of soapy water and two washing up brushes.  I scrub it off quickly and the patrol car passes again to make sure I'm doing what I'm told.

This little drama serves to prove two things though:

1) If curtain twitchers reported me, the police are very responsive in my area of N8

2) If it was just a random patrol, it does please me that our streets are being watched.  I only wish they'd keep an eye out for the perpetrators of the actual crime.

So, I'm back at home now, slightly exhilarated from the incident.  Mr Cupcake is hopping though - he'd just got back from work when I disappeared into the night in my pyjamas and is most concerned that I've nearly been arrested.  He's Albanian and kalashnikovs twitch for less than wielding chalk where he's from.

I should also do well to remember that he has St. Ann's hospital on speed dial.


Returning from the South Bank for an early Mother's Day lunch with the female clan of the Cupcake (not a turd in sight), I stepped off the W7 into this vision of loveliness.  Up to now my guerilla cleaning campaign has been reasonably discreet, practised away from onlookers but this unholy mess had the potential to ruin my almost perfect day. 

I won't bore with monologue.  Just look at the pictures, they speak for themselves: right next door to the W7 stop on the Broadway with early revellers setting off on their evening out and older folks retiring for the day, getting walking aids smeared in sh*t.  Totally, totally revolting.

 Now this is more like the sort of dog idle N8-ers should have.  Instantly solving the poo problem and cute to boot.  As a rather accomplished knitter these days, I'd be happy to knock one up for anyone who wants one.  Granted not as companionable as the real thing but a heck of a lot less effort.


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